Surprisingly, this feels pretty good.
I've had to resist the habits I've created for so many years and it comes with challenges.
Goodbye to this:
Have lunch, drink a glass (or 2) of wine.
5:00 Have a beer or another glass or wine.
Then it became 4:00.
7:00 Open a bottle of red wine.
Then it became 6:00.
Finish half the bottle.
Then it turned into the whole bottle.
Then open another bottle at 10:00.
Showing houses? Take wine to go!
Going out to dinner? Take the cup.
Kids in the car? No big deal, they can't tell what it is.
Mom, what's in your cup?
Oh shit. She's starting to notice.
Mom. You look tired. Are you tired? (7:30 glassy eye has settled in)
You see the trend.
It was getting pretty bad. I could give more examples and maybe one day I'll be comfortable enough in this process to know that they're not going to happen again and I'll be more free to share.
It's been fairly easy for the past 4 full days.
Trying to create new habits. Going to bed earlier. Keeping a glass of water poured so that I'm reaching for that instead. A cold glass of Topo Chico with a squeeze of lime is also nice.
I'm slightly nervous about social events coming up.
How in the world will I spend a week at the beach with my family without drinking some beers on the beach? Or what about Avett Brothers at Red Rocks in July? How is that possible?
Football season, Thanksgiving, Christmas with in-laws?
I guess the point is that there will always be something 'coming up' and I have a strong history of addiction progression. There is just really no reason for me to keep going.
With me, a few beers in the afternoon has always meant that the party won't stop until I pass out.
Say something embarrassing or rude, endanger myself or someone else.
These are the things I must remember.
Thoughts that have kept me going so far:
Think of how good you'll feel in the morning!
How nice will it be to not have to piece together the events of last night?
Do you really want to read through last nights text messages to see to what you overcommitted?
You'll actually remember what you fed the kids last night or whether or not they had a bath.
Nothing to regret and everyone is safe and sound.
Health benefits are endless.
You'll maybe actually read a book!
No doubt you'll remember all the conversations had with your husband yesterday. Bonus.
Better sleep.
TESTIMONY! If I say I believe in a God that can work miracles, yet don't let Him do the work in me that I know He's called me to...how real and true is my faith?? I have no doubt that there is a greater purpose for my life that I have stifled with alcohol.
Rebuilding me layer by layer and choice by choice.
I've had to resist the habits I've created for so many years and it comes with challenges.
Goodbye to this:
Have lunch, drink a glass (or 2) of wine.
5:00 Have a beer or another glass or wine.
Then it became 4:00.
7:00 Open a bottle of red wine.
Then it became 6:00.
Finish half the bottle.
Then it turned into the whole bottle.
Then open another bottle at 10:00.
Showing houses? Take wine to go!
Going out to dinner? Take the cup.
Kids in the car? No big deal, they can't tell what it is.
Mom, what's in your cup?
Oh shit. She's starting to notice.
Mom. You look tired. Are you tired? (7:30 glassy eye has settled in)
You see the trend.
It was getting pretty bad. I could give more examples and maybe one day I'll be comfortable enough in this process to know that they're not going to happen again and I'll be more free to share.
It's been fairly easy for the past 4 full days.
Trying to create new habits. Going to bed earlier. Keeping a glass of water poured so that I'm reaching for that instead. A cold glass of Topo Chico with a squeeze of lime is also nice.
I'm slightly nervous about social events coming up.
How in the world will I spend a week at the beach with my family without drinking some beers on the beach? Or what about Avett Brothers at Red Rocks in July? How is that possible?
Football season, Thanksgiving, Christmas with in-laws?
I guess the point is that there will always be something 'coming up' and I have a strong history of addiction progression. There is just really no reason for me to keep going.
With me, a few beers in the afternoon has always meant that the party won't stop until I pass out.
Say something embarrassing or rude, endanger myself or someone else.
These are the things I must remember.
Thoughts that have kept me going so far:
Think of how good you'll feel in the morning!
How nice will it be to not have to piece together the events of last night?
Do you really want to read through last nights text messages to see to what you overcommitted?
You'll actually remember what you fed the kids last night or whether or not they had a bath.
Nothing to regret and everyone is safe and sound.
Health benefits are endless.
You'll maybe actually read a book!
No doubt you'll remember all the conversations had with your husband yesterday. Bonus.
Better sleep.
TESTIMONY! If I say I believe in a God that can work miracles, yet don't let Him do the work in me that I know He's called me to...how real and true is my faith?? I have no doubt that there is a greater purpose for my life that I have stifled with alcohol.
Rebuilding me layer by layer and choice by choice.
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